The Hopefulness of the Chain Letter

1.

I got this e-mail the other day from an old friend.

It went like this:

Dear XXXX,  
You are my 8 women, who if we were in a room together, 
could accomplish anything we set our minds to. 
So read the directions below and send this to 7 more women. 
I count as the eighth woman. 
 
I am supposed to pick 7 women who have touched my life and who 
I think might participate. 
I think that if this group of women were ever to be in a room together, 
there is nothing that would be impossible. 
I hope I chose the right six... Please send this back to me.

Remember to make a wish before you read the quotation.. 
That's all you have to do. 
There is nothing attached. 
Just send this to six women and let me know what happens on the fourth day. 
Sorry you have to forward the message, 
but try not to break this, please. Did you make a wish yet? 
If you don't make a wish, it won't come true. This is your last chance to make a wish!
 
 

My room of 8

May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.

Now, I really hate this kind of e-mail.

I hate this kind of e-mail for a couple reasons:

1.  I'm usually about the fourth in the chain, and by

the time it gets to me, the formatting of the actual

special little message is so messed up, I can't even read

the thing.  In the case of this message, it ran way off 

the page, and I had to scroll scroll scroll to read the

entire sentence.

2.  I often get them from people I haven't heard from in 

awhile, but they're people I care about.  So I want to let 

them know that I really value being one of the eight women

in her room of eight women, and the most efficient way to do that

is to send this message to eight women (one being her)

so she knows she's in my room of eight women, too.

3.  But then I leave six of my friends in the same quandary.

4. There's this question of something special, perhaps even magical

that will happen after four days.  Now, I happen to believe

in magic.

Or at least I'm hopeful.

So there's this tantalizing possibility

that in four days,

I'll discover something very 

mysterious and magical.

And part of me wants to believe

that that is possible.  When in 

actual fact, what I'll discover is

which of my friends is sucker enough

to send this on.

Probably one.

In fact, she did it already, because

I fell for it.

In a moment of weakness, I chose

that lucky seven.

(or should it be six?--

if I'm one and the friend

who sent me the message

is two, then it should be 

six.  Yes, it should be six.)

Whatever.

I did it.

And one of my friends

did it too

already.

3.

Well,

the morning after I sent this poorly formatted message

to seven lucky people, six of whom probably hit

"delete" without even bothering to read the thing,

I started thinking about it, 

and thinking about

why the heck I sent that

to my sister-in-law.

I actually really do like her.

And then, I started thinking,

as I am prone to do,

I started thinking about earlier versions of these

messages:

the chain letter.

(chainletterevolution an interesting article!)

I remember the first one I ever got,

when I was about eight years old.

I think it was from my cousin, S, and 

she sent this tightly folded sheet of 

notebook paper, scrawled in pencil, telling me to 

copy it and send it

to twelve other people.  The bulk of the letter

was a list of fifteen names, with my cousin's

at the bottom.  The letter told me to copy the letter, with all the names except the first one,

and make sure my name was

at the bottom of the list.

I was then supposed to take that name that I deleted from the top of the list

and send that person at the top of the list

one dollar.

The hope is that,

if I sent this letter to the right people,

they would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would send it to the right people,

who would

ultimately

all send me a dollar

and I'd be able to retire at the age of 

sixteen.

My mother

saw the letter, and said:

"don't you dare send that letter to twelve people,

and don't you dare send her a dollar.  I'm 

going to tell S's mother (my mother's sister)

that she's sending those awful things out."

Awful things.

"The only person who is going to make money off of that

will be your cousin, and she'll make a dollar,

off of you!"

That's what my mother said.

And I sure as hell wasn't going

to be a fool

and send my stinking cousin

a dollar.

So I threw the thing out,

with my mother watching,

before she marched to the phone

and called her sister.

From that point on,

I considered

chain letters to be

vile,

a thing of the devil,

designed to deceive

pathetic people

like me.

~

Moms seem to be central figures in Chain Letters, and they tend to be

the voices of reason:

I'm not sure when this happened,

but mom has been replaced:

the Federal Government has 

acknowledged that people who trust

are fools, and that people who start

chain letters are scam artists.

They made it illegal;

here's a message about that

from the 

Federal Trade Commission.

4.

Clearly,

there is an evil side to chain letters,

if chain letters

threaten

death to your mother

death to you

death to your dog

traffic accidents

bad dreams

whatever. . . .

It appears that the internet has caused 

the proliferation

of this genre

and no one is ever

asked to send

a dollar

to anyone anymore,

you just have to send the thing on

or be scared shitless.

That particularly type of chain letter

tends to target young people

who are easily scared shitless.

Now, why isn't there a law about that?

5.

The thing about Chain Letters

and our distrust of them

is that in our society,

there is the belief

that there are, essentially,

two different kind of people:

the scammers

and

the scammed;

aka

the wise

and 

the stupid;

aka

the deceitful

and

the trusting;

aka

the evil

and 

the good

and the two twains shall never meet,

and people never change.

This is a fundamental premise in our society.

And people are, either by choice or by nature,

one or the other,

and

if you send a dollar to the first name on the chain letter,

you will surely 

never receive a dollar.

You're better off

not sending the dollar and therefore not receiving the dollar,

rather than sending the dollar and being made to look like

a fool.

6.

Still, I look back

at the message I sent

to seven of my most forgiving friends,

and I am struck by the hope in it

a hope not too different

from my youthful hope

as I contemplating sending a dollar to someone I didn't know.

That message promised me something

magical,

something special.

And I think:

what is the most magical thing that could happen?

I won't get a penny,

nor will any of my friends,

but perhaps,

if I could throw aside my distrust --

indeed, if distrust was not the norm --

in four days,

my inbox will have six or seven messages in it

from six or seven women who would put me 

in their room of eight,

and each of those messages would have

the names of seven other women;

and each of those women would get e-mails

in four days

with seven more friends of friends.

And all these women let themselves think, for a little while at least:

May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.

We would create an endless chain of women

all living in a virtual place called

our collective brains,

and if we all worked together,

we might actually accomplish

something peaceful 

and good.

We'd be wise, too,

to invite men, as well.

Men who won't break the chain.

Inherent in this type of chain letter

is a belief 

that there is a potential magic

in collective action

when that action involves

positive thought,

or thought that is grounded

unselfishly, 

in love.

Now that's worth more than a dollar.

~

At the heart of the chain letter,

even the evil chain letter,

are some essential human

emotions:

hope and fear, and

they are two sides

of the same coin

that we tender as we

plan for the future.

We hope for more money;

we fear someone will 

kill us

before we get more money,

and we fret over that

and then

we do nothing;

and nothing happens to us.

Society has a job

to keep us from

deceiving and destroying one another,

but that job would be easier

if people took the risk

to trust, 

to show love,

to love 

and 

be loved.

Generally,

for most people, 

the concept of doing those things

is pretty geeky, stupid, weak

gullible, naive,

when in actual fact,

to do those things

takes the most superhuman strength 

one can imagine.

And that could

have the power

to make magic.

Naive,

young, even,

but look at me,

after 424 years

of watching people

deceive,

lie,

kill,

rape,

abuse,

tease,

torment,

etcetcetcetc,

this is the only thing that makes sense.