Place of Refuge

Place of Refuge

05 November 2010

a pinch of the imperfect (an imperfect channelling)

*


"If the entire human species were a single individual, that person would long ago have been declared mad. The insanity would not lie in the anger and darkness of the human mind—though it can be a black and raging place indeed. And it certainly wouldn't lie in the transcendent goodness of that mind—one so sublime, we fold it into a larger "soul." The madness would lie instead in the fact that both of those qualities, the savage and the splendid, can exist in one creature, one person, often in one instant."  (Jeffrey Kugler, "What Makes Us Moral?" Time Magazine 3 March 2007)

This is a difficult concept to grasp,
that we are two in one,
we, the human occupying the human 
body
are two in one --
we each contain the 
ability
to be good
to be bad
all at the same time,
we 
all
are 
two, and the two we contain
are the imitation 
of the part of God
that became manifest
as the moment of the splitting,
the splitting being
the physical act God
had to produce
             in order
to be able to reproduce
Himself.

God had to split
in half, into
the negative and the positive,
in order to see:
                 the positive
                       is what She saw,
the glorious, succulent
material present


that is what God saw:
the visual, the 
aural, the
tactile,
the
sensual, the
aromatic,
all that IS
is what God saw:

all that IS
is good is bad
is what God saw






So . . . . .  .
 
if God saw the all that he created,
and it was good,
what in heaven's name was doing the seeing?
WHAT saw it all,
and WHAT was glad?
 
What did the seeing was always that
which could not be seen,
the negative,
the negative -
the negative !
the other side of the 
dichotomy,
in Derridean terms:

MALE                     FEMALE
positive                  negative
light                    dark
day                       night
spoken                           silent
visible                        invisible
 
 We live in the realm of the visible,
of the male,
but it was our opposite -
that was there
but not there
to view the creation
and to be amazed by it.



Ever since the onset of the Renaissance
(when Makropoulos was 
born,
by the way)
that glorious time
when the mind had evolved to a more mature
level of being able to reproduce
itself,
ever since then, 
the trend 
has been to focus
on the male:
the physical manifestion
that god produced in order to be able
to see Herself --
and hey
wouldn't you want to fixate
on that for awhile?
wouldn't you want to fixate on that
fabulous something
that you created
in order to see
yourself?
Imagine it:
here you are, 
you are invisible and
undivisable,
and you just created
something visibly 
you,
you gave yourself 
the opportunity to see
yourself
in the mirror
wouldn't you want
to look at it
for a thousand years
or so?

Wouldn't you want to see it,
just turn it over and over
in your hands
and adore it?



It would be
your perfect opposite,
your mythic soulmate:
there you'd be
and you would be so amazed
at the beauty of it,
you would gaze into it,
get lost in it.

(Mirrors have been the replacement for
the absence of the Others;
they've been here to keep us
company, and to let us know
what we look like, so
when we see our other halves,
we'll recognize them.)

So that was the moment
of splitting,
the moment
of making visible
ourselves,

that was it - the first act that all 
creation has been doomed
ever since
to repeat and represent.

Every physical entity on earth
contains within it an imitation
of that moment of splitting
 
The sperm (the physical
projectile born
of the desire to
see and be with the 
Other
                (so completely),
yes the sperm is
the physical imitation of the desire
to enter into
the engulfing presence
of the engenderer.

(if you can figure that one out,
you get a gold star---)
 
* * *
 
because the Other to the physical creation
is so Beautiful
that the physical creation
wants, immediately
to penetrate and become
part of it again.

Something like that.
)




Every physical entity on earth
contains within it an imitation
of that moment of splitting

Indeed, that includes
the human,
the creature doomed
to strut and fret
our time upon this stage,

we, our body-avatars,
and the trinity 
of liquidity
we each contain
are all the imitation
of what god produced and saw
at that moment of dividing
in half,
              but the problem,
              as Isaac Luria helps us see,
was that the creation
of the duplication
of God produced
such a force
[the power of God]
made manifest
         at the moment
              of this production,
there was such an explosion,

( baylor )

like fireworks,

 That
 
is the manifestation
of the power
of 

GOD
 
 
 
I'm serious.




 . . . . and at the moment of the bang,
everything
became visible
physical,
ie:
it was created.

(It's that simple!)
 
 
 So, anyway,
at that mment of explosion and 
production,

the negative,              the positive
the unseen,                     the seen,
the unheard                        the heard
the unfelt,                 the felt
came to be.

it's that simple, 
those concepts
and all they signify
came to be
be 
cause
of creation
and the creative urge.


So we live in the physical realm, because that's the
half of God we
occupy,
but 
that doesn't preclude
the existence of the
non existent.

It's just there,

and all that it (the non-existent) contains
is the negative
of the totality
that is the manifest
in
the physical.
(That's a hard concept to grasp
when you live in the physical.)

But as I said,
the problem
                        and the beauty
                 of it all
is that each of us
contains
an imitation
of that doubling
to one extent or the other.


So Luria helps me say: god created
the imitation of
god, male and female
so they could see
themselves,
but the energy produced at that 
moment
was too great
for the illusion,
the representation
to remain while,
so it exploded and shattered
into pieces
and the pieces 
got the unenviable job
of picking up the pieces
and having to put them back
together 
again.


And that's what we've been doing
for millenia,
and god
in Her distant place, delighted
at the delightful games
of Her children BUT
got disturbed if the Boys
got too rough


*

please think semiotically

*

ANYWAY,
all species also imitate
the duality and the moment
of creation
and the Desire
to Reproduce,
over and over because
that desire
and compulsion
has maintained
our existence

giving us
time
to evolve
our minds,
our souls,
our spirits
our goods and our evils,
all the intangible
invisible
entities that
the frail human body
was appointed
to contain and sustain in
the delicate cases
we encase:
our brains,
our hearts,
our solar plexus,
our stomachs, which provide
the protective shield for containing
the unprotectable.


Our fingers,
our ears,
our eyes 
represent
the fingers,
ears,
eyes
of God
 made manifest
at the moment when We
confronted
our eact opposites, 
those which contains
our good and our bad,
we,
who contain
God's essences
     imitate
that moment of looking, too,
which also includes the moment
of being disappointed
because our Other
our Creation
isn't perfect,
wasn't perfect,
won't be perfect,
won't be Us
completely
because if God's
Other Half
was perfect,
God wouldn't be able to see it,
because He would be it.
 
that's right :

we wouldn't have to divide ourselves
in an attempt to see
ourselves
if we didn't contain 
a pinch

of the imperfect.


Oh, now you,
dear reader who dared
to make it this far,
you wonder:
where the hell is this going?

As I sit and read this,
I know what it says.
It says:
I even I
with my changeable moods,
my unchartable soul,
my angry temper
my fits of elation
and tearful, lonely evenings
I contain 
an imitation
of God at the moemnt
tHEy
(male and female)
let the pinch of imperfection
influence itself and deicde
to divide 
so it could see itself


I imitate that moment
of god's self-consciousness,
and imitate
the entity he saw,
the entity that was 
too great
to be whole,
so it exploded
and became 
the scattered remnants
of the visible
             reproduction of God--

and the shattering, glimmering parts of the fractured god 
regrouped
 - so to speak -
and became
planets and stars
and plants and animals
all 
species,
all with our different task,
as we have worked together over the ages,
striving to reproduce the whole,

and humans had the job
of building the connections ,
and over time we have evolved
and we have reached
a
near perfect
connection


I can sit in my living room and see and talk to 
in real time
a friend of mine
in Singapore.

We're so close to being the complete unity
we're supposed to be
but we have 
one problem:
 
we each still feel we're different from each other.



We are at a cusp.


We each have to recognize
that in our individual selves
though we reproduce both parts of god,
still,
within our individual selves
we can really only contain 
half,
and somewhere there
is the Other 
half of us
with whom,
when we're together
we produce a melting
into One, just One
 
 
this applies equally to 
individuals,
families,
states,
nations,
worlds. . . .

*

And you see we each
have to recognize
and admit
that in containing 
the parts of god, we must
also contain god's opposite,
which is 
evil
because evil is something 
God created, 
so we would all know good.

God is all,
and so are we,
but we
just happen to be
fractured all,
the physical part of God
that God produced
when God felt the desire
to see
the self.


Do we want to See God
in our time?
Well, you know,
the only way we can do that
is to act like the gods
we were born to be,
which means
we need to recognize
that the man and the woman
the most opposite
of ourselves
is one essential piece
in the visible puzzle
of the perfect picture
of the product of god.

We need
to forgive ourselves
our faults
and forgive our
brothers their faults
and forgive the Others:
the dark,
the female,
the strange,
the silent,
as they must do
unto us.

It's that flippin' easy.

Jesus said it too,

but he was rendered a sound bite.

Still,
his message 
never changed.


The most essential part
of this simple task is
that we must be honest
with ourselves
first,
and see our flaws,
and once we honestly
acknowledge
the wrong we ourselves
have committed or contemplated,
we can also look past
what we view
as the wrongs in others.

I'm not saying we should get rid 
of our negative impulses.

We can't.

But we should acknowledge
them,
live with them,
find 
an arena in which we can
act on them 
so no one gets hurt
and get on with the task
of saving our earth,

that is,
if we do indeed enjoy this joy ride we've been on
enough
to want to see it survive beyond
the next step
in our evolution.
 
 
 

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